DEATH OF WORDS

I am unable to sleep,
a big disaster
surrounds me,
words that I have spoken
and sent out into the world
are suddenly returning weary,
ill, dreadfully anxious,
they seek a refuge from destruction,
flutter, squeal,
chirp haltingly, swarm around me
they are fleeing from triteness and oblivion,
from the glass eye of a corpse,
from a laser beam that ignores
its reflection,
the infected words
cram up in greedy haste, they
stammer, writhe in pain,
they\'ve lost their way home,
their resting place,
they flutter above me
as I lie empty and mute in the dark.
I recognize them, tamed, wild,
gay and sad, dreamy,
frightened, big, treacherous,
miserable, playful, erotic,
heroic, pious, all motherly,
all mine, my father\'s, all my essence,
my recollections, my presentiments.
my prophecy, my dying.
The room is crammed with the in,
they settle on objects, are unable to leave,
burden me, beseech me as they lie dying,
sobbing repeatedly:
all tree trunks desecrated
all nests destroyed
all mouths mute.
The disaster inhabits me,
there is no place I can return them to,
am unable to console them,
stretch my arm
or open my mouth,
am unable to caress the word despair or
say anything to the words solace, deliverance,
the words toy and grace are choking me,
on my eyes land those shot as they fled
man, mother, love, loyalty,
the unhappy ones I neglected or never uttered
settle on my chest
but one of them has nestled
right between my trembling lips,
never have I seen it in the lexicon.

Besede umirajo

Besede umirajo

Ne morem zaspati,
okoli mene nastaja
velika nesreca,
besede, ki sem jih kdaj koli
spregovoril in pošiljal v svet,
se nenadoma vracajo utrujene,
bolne, vznemirjene na smrt,
išcejo zavetja pred poginom,
prhutajo, krilijo, cvrcijo,
civkajo zateglo, obletavajo me,
bezijo pred obrabo in pozabo,
pred steklenim ocesom mrtveca,
pred laserjevim zarkom, ki zavraca
premislek in posrednika,
nastaja kuzno plapolanje izraza,
širi se hlastna naglica, besede
jecajo, zvijajo se v krcih,
ne vedo vec domov, kjer so si
sleherno noc spocile,
plahutajo nad menoj,
ki lezim v temi prazen in nem,
prepoznavam jih, udomacene, divje,
radostne In zalostne, sanjske,
preplašene, neznanske, izdajalske,
obupne, igrive, ljubezenske,
junaške, pobozne, vse materinske,
vse moje, ocetove, vse moje bistvo,
moji spomini. moje slutnje,
moje preroštvo, moje umiranje,
soba jih je polna,
sedajo na predmete, nikamor ne morejo,
bremenijo me, rotijo me, umirajo,
ihtijo in ponavljajo,
vsa dupla onesnazena,
vsa gnezda razdrta,
vsi razgledi zaprti,
vsa usta nema,
katastrofa se seli vame,
nikamor jih ne morem vrniti,
z nicemer potolaziti,
niti roke ne morem stegniti
in niti ust odpreti,
besede obup ne morem pobozati, nic ne
morem reci besedama tolazba, rešitev,
besedi igraca in milost me davita,
na oci mi sedajo tiste, na begu ustreljene,
clovek, mati, ljubezen, zvestoba,
na prsi mi legajo tiste nesrecne,
ki sem jih zanemarjal ali nikoli izgovoril,
ena med njimi pa se mi je ugnezdila
prav med drhtecimi ustnicami,
nikoli je se nisem videl v besednjaku.