Poem
Emily Berry
The Musculoskeletal Condition
The Musculoskeletal Condition
The Musculoskeletal Condition
Every time I step outside I bang my soul on an osteopath.When the phone rings it’s usually an osteopath, calling to tell me about the new bones.
Osteopaths! I am tired of prostrating myself on your rolled-out strips of paper.
Sure, the musculoskeletal condition is just as important as the downturn!
It could be a contributing factor.
Yes, I will vote for you, osteopath.
I will praise your children.
I will consider holidaying in the Dordogne region.
Osteopaths, stop rummaging in my pockets I have nothing left.
Osteopaths, I’m sorry I didn’t mean it.
It’s just . . . the balance of power does not favour the achy.
(I can hear the coathangers jangling.)
Osteopaths, why are none of you in the government?
Osteopaths, how did you all meet and what do you talk about (besides the musculoskeletal
condition) at the osteopaths’ barbecues?
What would you do if everybody got better and you could no longer afford these premises?
Osteopaths, thank you for answering my questions.
Thank you for your sterile gel.
Thank you for your kind interest in my poetry.
© 2012, Emily Berry
Emily Berry
(United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, 1981)
Emily Berry was born in 1981 and, other than time at university in Leeds, is ‘quite a diehard Londoner’, in her words, having lived there all her life. She has studied Creative and Life Writing at Goldsmiths, University of London, and in 2008 received an Eric Gregory Award. In the same year, her pamphlet Stingray Fevers joined tall-lighthouse’s Pilot series, edited by Roddy Lumsden. In March 20...
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The Musculoskeletal Condition
Every time I step outside I bang my soul on an osteopath.When the phone rings it’s usually an osteopath, calling to tell me about the new bones.
Osteopaths! I am tired of prostrating myself on your rolled-out strips of paper.
Sure, the musculoskeletal condition is just as important as the downturn!
It could be a contributing factor.
Yes, I will vote for you, osteopath.
I will praise your children.
I will consider holidaying in the Dordogne region.
Osteopaths, stop rummaging in my pockets I have nothing left.
Osteopaths, I’m sorry I didn’t mean it.
It’s just . . . the balance of power does not favour the achy.
(I can hear the coathangers jangling.)
Osteopaths, why are none of you in the government?
Osteopaths, how did you all meet and what do you talk about (besides the musculoskeletal
condition) at the osteopaths’ barbecues?
What would you do if everybody got better and you could no longer afford these premises?
Osteopaths, thank you for answering my questions.
Thank you for your sterile gel.
Thank you for your kind interest in my poetry.
The Musculoskeletal Condition
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