Poem
Paul Perry
GUNPOWDER VALENTINE
GUNPOWDER VALENTINE
GUNPOWDER VALENTINE
I.I went there too
I did not have to go
I saw the best of men
clearing the villages was awful
we hated ourselves for that
in the streets we found
maddened cows dripping
with milk
bellowing in pain
it was something terrible
I saw a cat in a window
I thought it was an ornament
then I saw that it was alive
I killed the cat
I got used to killing
forgive us
we found notes nailed
to the doors of houses
be careful we’ll be back
don’t kill our cat
our house we are sorry
for leaving you
cold and alone
I came home
my wife was frightened
she insisted I throw my clothes away
I did that
all except for my hat
it had a badge on the front
and my son I knew would like it
he was proud of me
he went around wearing this hat
some nights he wore it in bed
one year after that time
he fell ill
it was a brain tumour
that was it
I can say
no more
II.
I dream about it every night
we arrived at 6 a.m.
we told them to leave everything
they cried
as if they knew
they would never return
they offered us moonshine
everything was negotiable
we bartered cattle
they were sold cheap
Nature was dying
the houses were like works of art
empty now
the shadow of madness
was on us all
III.
we lifted the topsoil
the burial grounds were open pits
we stripped the earth and orchards
do not have children they told us
at night we drank
we drank hard
we slept in beds of straw
IV.
we gathered at the train station
it was May
we had been chosen
our work was secret
the mood was fun
we were conscripts
and were called tourists
from the trains we saw the fields
change from green
to something more lunar
white dolomite sand covered
miles of field where the green
earth had once been
we knew then something
was very wrong
the roofs had the names of women
Katya Natasha Anna
Marsha was the mad one
she was cut open like a wound
we stopped laughing
after we arrived in hell
V.
they bent to the water
but did not drink
VI.
the garden all dressed
in wedding white
my hives over there
under the apple trees
I said to Nina my wife
what? wrong
I put on my mask
and checked
they were there
sitting in the hives
not making a sound
there was no buzzing
so strange was their silence
VII.
the rain was black
and one by one the children fell
I will never forget the mornings
the girls had ribbons in their hair
the boys wore shorts
inside I am empty
I have seen and heard too much
I was happy once
the children came from love
our lives are a long winter
without Spring
we bury the children? clothes in dirt
VIII.
we came carrying birch and rowan
a storm broke
dust entered our mouths and eyes
like a black wing
we went on singing
the rivers are our enemies
picking strawberries is not allowed
or bluebells or daisies or mushrooms
the village is buried
in a bitter dream
© 2011, Paul Perry
Many words in ‘Gunpowder Valentine’ are taken from a variety of sources in Adi Roche’s Chernobyl Heart, 20 Years On.
Poems
Poems of Paul Perry
Close
GUNPOWDER VALENTINE
I.I went there too
I did not have to go
I saw the best of men
clearing the villages was awful
we hated ourselves for that
in the streets we found
maddened cows dripping
with milk
bellowing in pain
it was something terrible
I saw a cat in a window
I thought it was an ornament
then I saw that it was alive
I killed the cat
I got used to killing
forgive us
we found notes nailed
to the doors of houses
be careful we’ll be back
don’t kill our cat
our house we are sorry
for leaving you
cold and alone
I came home
my wife was frightened
she insisted I throw my clothes away
I did that
all except for my hat
it had a badge on the front
and my son I knew would like it
he was proud of me
he went around wearing this hat
some nights he wore it in bed
one year after that time
he fell ill
it was a brain tumour
that was it
I can say
no more
II.
I dream about it every night
we arrived at 6 a.m.
we told them to leave everything
they cried
as if they knew
they would never return
they offered us moonshine
everything was negotiable
we bartered cattle
they were sold cheap
Nature was dying
the houses were like works of art
empty now
the shadow of madness
was on us all
III.
we lifted the topsoil
the burial grounds were open pits
we stripped the earth and orchards
do not have children they told us
at night we drank
we drank hard
we slept in beds of straw
IV.
we gathered at the train station
it was May
we had been chosen
our work was secret
the mood was fun
we were conscripts
and were called tourists
from the trains we saw the fields
change from green
to something more lunar
white dolomite sand covered
miles of field where the green
earth had once been
we knew then something
was very wrong
the roofs had the names of women
Katya Natasha Anna
Marsha was the mad one
she was cut open like a wound
we stopped laughing
after we arrived in hell
V.
they bent to the water
but did not drink
VI.
the garden all dressed
in wedding white
my hives over there
under the apple trees
I said to Nina my wife
what? wrong
I put on my mask
and checked
they were there
sitting in the hives
not making a sound
there was no buzzing
so strange was their silence
VII.
the rain was black
and one by one the children fell
I will never forget the mornings
the girls had ribbons in their hair
the boys wore shorts
inside I am empty
I have seen and heard too much
I was happy once
the children came from love
our lives are a long winter
without Spring
we bury the children? clothes in dirt
VIII.
we came carrying birch and rowan
a storm broke
dust entered our mouths and eyes
like a black wing
we went on singing
the rivers are our enemies
picking strawberries is not allowed
or bluebells or daisies or mushrooms
the village is buried
in a bitter dream
Many words in ‘Gunpowder Valentine’ are taken from a variety of sources in Adi Roche’s Chernobyl Heart, 20 Years On.
GUNPOWDER VALENTINE
Sponsors
Partners
LantarenVenster – Verhalenhuis Belvédère